I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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