So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
So squirting runs in the family.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
