Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Randomize
