we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
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