On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
you made out with another girl for some wings
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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