do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I will die if light touches me.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
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