Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
You smell like a Billy Joel song
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Randomize
