Dude my mom stole all your condoms
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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