We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Randomize
