i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
