Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
