I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Randomize