Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
My ATM looks so different sober.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Randomize