omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize