I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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