did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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