Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
