I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
