Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Randomize
