i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
