The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Randomize
