ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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