just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
pop tarts are not kleenex
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Randomize
