This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
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Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?