The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
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