3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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