would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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