You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
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