Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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