Plan B is the new Plan A
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
