just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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