Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize
