when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
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