Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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