she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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