Where is the hickey?
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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