Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
i out mim tonsoeep
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