You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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