Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize
