Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
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