I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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