My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
