her vagina looked like bernie madoff
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Randomize
