So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
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