Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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