Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Randomize
