He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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