He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
