So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
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