he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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