I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize