I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
